...Got it working with Debian (not armbian) if I controlled the power-on and connection order carefully. But the easier fix was to grab a used i3 desktop machine and install Ubuntu Studio into that, reserving the SBC for future projects.
It's amazing what SBCs can do... but if you don't need maximum compactness, minimum power draw, or direct hardware interfacing, sometimes using something better standardized/supported will be the winning choice.
Oh well. Only a small detour, and a few bucks that it turned out I didn't need to spend right now; not a disaster.
"No honest effort is ever wasted; it can always serve as a bad example."